The things that were challenging about being a new mom were not the things I expected to be the hardest. I was prepared not to get much sleep and quite worried about it actually. (I am not fun to be around while tired or hungry - guess I'll never be on Survivor.) But sleeping has never been a problem. Nora Lee slept in bed with us which was wonderful on so many levels. In the first month or so she slept on my chest. For a while I was always on the couch or in bed with her on my chest sleeping. At night I would put two pillows on either side of me to support my arms and we just slept that way. When she awoke and needed nursing we were already in the right position. This was amazing because it barely required me waking up. As a result, I have always been well rested.
When she got a little bigger I began sleeping with her beside me and would nurse her by laying on my side with our bellies touching. She would just latch on during the night when hungry and then we would both fall back to sleep. We put a guard rail on the side of the bed so that she couldn't fall out.
Matt was nervous about this plan. He worried about squishing her in the night. As the months went on he realized that if he put a pillow between him and her he felt secure and she just got bigger and more durable and we were able to all sleep soundly together. I must say that our queen size bed was feeling a bit small though!
We have all been attached to "the family bed" because there is nothing quite like snuggling all night with the ones you love. Matt and I awaken each morning to a giggling, smiling baby girl. It's the best. A few nights ago we became aware that Nora Lee may not be sleeping as well as she could be in bed with us. She started wiggling and couldn't get comfortable. We put her in her crib to sleep and she passed right out. So the last several nights she has slept all night in her crib and seems to be doing well. I was worried about missing her in bed but it is nice to have a little more room to myself :) She is still waking every few hours to nurse and it does require me getting out of bed and going into her room but I think soon she won't need to eat as often and I will get more concentrated sleep.
Anyway, so the sleep things has been good. However, I was surprised how tired and sore I was after giving birth. My body felt very weak and tender. Even sitting down hurt. It seems like a no-brainer when something so big comes out of you but I hadn't heard anyone talk about it and hadn't thought it through to be frank. During the first few weeks all I could do was move from the bed to the couch, eat, nurse (more on that in a second) and sleep. I was still developing feelings for Nora Lee. Matt was connected from the first moment but I experienced more of a falling in love rather than a love at first sight.
Slowly, my strength recovered and I started to get to know my little one. How sweet that falling in love was.
Once everything healed, the hardest thing was nursing. When I was pregnant I was told about nursing consultants, nursing classes, support groups, and I thought what the heck is this? Just stick the baby on your boob and feed her, how hard can it be? Well, it was hard. And it did hurt. At the beginning I dreaded (and was scared to be honest) every time Nora was hungry. I dreaded the pain and wondered when it would get better. After 2 months or so it felt better and breastfeeding has gone smoothly (mostly) since.
I was really grateful to have those first three months to be home, figure out motherhood, rest, and do whatever felt right for Nora Lee and I. The world looked different to me after having a child and I wasn't ready to go out into it for a while. After that first trimester I began to get interested again in the outside world and looked forward to getting my body back in shape and being around other people and introducing them to my new love, Nora Lee.
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